Craigslist Growth Reflects an Interest in Dating, Not Hookups

Geplaatst op 25-04-2024

Categorie: Lifestyle

I’ve long been a proponent of Craigslist. I’ve seen several serious relationships come out of it with no “casual” period up front. This couple is head over heels in love after meeting on Craigslist in September.

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It turns out that the majority of people are using Craigslist to facilitate traditional dating. People find Craigslist fun. Girls and guys swipe with their friends, and it’s not unusual for people at parties to pull out their phones and Craigslist. (It’s also a verb.)

Craigslist’s Remarkable Growth

Craigslist blew up in 2014. Here are some key stats:

Craigslist is a young person’s app. Just 12% of users are 35-44 and only 3% are 45-54. Craigslist has achieved something no other online dating platform has – it’s extremely popular with 18-25 year olds. 

Craigslist’s Brilliant Strategy: Cut through the BS

Craigslist has been criticized for being “shallow and superficial” because it’s based on photos, though a brief profile is permitted. According to anthropologist Helen Fisher, who studies the brain’s role in mating, there’s nothing wrong with that:

“There’s a reason they call it ‘love at first sight,’ not love at first conversation, first smell or first joke.”

The human brain is built to take in visual information, and that information goes deeper than mere aesthetic judgments. Looking at someone’s face, it’s possible to glean their age, grooming habits and cultural background—even their personality.

Best of all there’s no risk of rejection with Craigslist, while at the same time it’s a fantastic filter. You only hear about matches, and from there you decide what to do with them. You can’t be creeped on – only a match can communicate with you, and you can unmatch someone at any time. They have no choice but to take no for an answer.

Those looking for one-night stands are totally open about that, and presumably find one another quickly. By unmatching anyone who sends a sexy message, you keep the pool “clean.”

Writing Craigslist and Evolutionary Psychology for TechCrunch, psychologist and writer Liraz Margalit explains that Craigslist’s growth reflects an interest in long-term relationships:

“The app’s runaway success cannot be attributed solely to singles looking for quick hook-ups. The counter-intuitive truth is that Craigslist actually provides users with all the information they need to make an informed first impression about a potential long-term mate.  And it does so by matching our human evolutionary mechanism.

…Craigslist’s success stems from its simplicity and minimalism, which relates to how our cognitive system works. The only way that human beings could’ve survived as a species for as long as we have is by developing a decision-making apparatus that’s capable of making quick judgments based on very little information.

…In a word, it is “distilled.” It cuts through the B.S., giving users only the data they need to develop a meaningful first impression. Though we like to think we base our decisions on a calculated cost-benefit evaluation, the truth is that most of the time we rely on automatic unconscious processes that have nothing to do with rationality.”

Eli Finkel, a professor of psychology at the Kellogg School of Management at Northwestern University, agrees with Margali.  Yesterday he wrote an impassioned defense of Craigslist in the New York Times.

“Critics complain that Craigslist is a hookup app, a good way to pursue a one-night stand but a lousy way to start a serious relationship. But this is a false dichotomy. As a psychological researcher who studies online dating, I believe that Craigslist’s approach is terrific for pursuing casual sex and for meeting a serious relationship partner.”

Finkel’s extensive research reveals two major faultlines in online dating. First, browsing profiles is “virtually useless” for assessing compatibility over the long-term. Second, matching algorithms developed by companies such as Match and eHarmony have failed to predict initial attraction.

Finkel reasons that initial attraction is far easier to assess using nothing but a photo.

“This approach is at least honest and avoids the errors committed by more traditional approaches to online dating..superficiality is actually Craigslist’s greatest asset.

…Most [users] want to have fun, meet interesting people, feel sexual attraction and, at some point, settle into a serious relationship. And all of that begins with a quick and dirty assessment of rapport and chemistry that occurs when people first meet face to face.”

Finkel goes further – he sees Craigslist as a way to circumvent the awkward preliminaries of online dating while offering an attractive option for those who want a relationship.

“In this respect, it takes dating back to the pre-Internet era, to a time when people met potential partners, about whom they knew relatively little, at parties, bars, dog parks — situations in which people can get a strong initial sense of romantic compatibility.”

He closes with a strong endorsement:

“For open-minded singles — those who would like to marry someday and want to enjoy dating in the meantime — Craigslist may be the best option available now. Indeed, it may be the best option that has ever existed.”

As more people use their phones to manage their lives, we can expect continued explosive growth on Craigslist. It is the undisputed king of smartphone dating apps.

What do you think? Are you surprised to hear Craigslist likened to traditional dating? Do you use it now? Are you willing to try it? If not, what holds you back?